Friday, September 18, 2015

I... Failed?

Please welcome Recruit Vanessa. In this entry, she discusses the high level of academic achievement required  of each recruit.


I sat in my assigned seat during the first week of the Police Academy and listened to the policies and procedures over and over again. Virtually every week there would be an exam. Passing is 80 percent. We were told multiple times that it would be highly frowned upon to flirt with an eighty, let alone get a lower grade.  We would be required to attend remedial sessions if we failed a test. We would also be subject to expulsion from our agencies if we stumbled more than a time or two.  As a recruit we should “strive for perfection, accept excellence,” and we are reminded of that every day by the plaque that hangs in the room.  The instructors drilled this into our heads over and over again; I thought to myself “that will never be me.” I would never fail a test, and I certainly would not forget anything.

The following Monday morning we sat down to take the test. I felt very comfortable and confident. I had studied a good amount on my weekend and I felt ready.  I answer all 50 questions and hit the green FINISH button, expecting to see “Congratulations, you passed.”

Nope. Instead, it stated something along the lines of, “I’m sorry, but you did not answer enough questions correctly.” My stomach sank. I was devastated.  I wanted to cry, but “there’s no crying in baseball” and there is certainly no crying at the Police Academy.  The realization sets in….. This Academy is going to be hard. I might actually fail.

I was sad and embarrassed that I did so poorly on the first test.  I knew the grades were going to be posted in the classroom, so there was no reason to hide from my failure.  Instead, I learned from my disappointment and knew that I needed to change.  I needed to adjust my studying skills and change my time management.  I knew that I could not do everything, and I knew now that I could not do it alone.  Who came to my rescue? My colleagues and my significant other.

I was always a person who never asked for help.  I always wanted to do everything on my own.  I thought that I was going to be able to give more time to my family at home.  But, I learned that, with the hour drive there and back from the academy building I was very short on time in the day.  I could no longer keep the house as clean as I would like it.  I could no longer make dinner every night.  I could no longer sit and watch my favorite shows.  I learned that these small indulgences in my life, ones that made me happy and made me feel useful, would be set aside for a while. 

 

My boyfriend saw my frustration.  He saw me going to bed at night exhausted.  He took it on himself to start doing more chores around the house. He started helping with the dishes, the grocery shopping, and the vacuuming.  I have learned that life doesn’t stop when you enter the Police Academy.  If anything, the six hours that I used to be able to spend on “my life” is now squeezed into two hours.  Having the support of my family to help me manage my “life” is priceless.

To tackle the academic issue, I went to the recruit who received the highest score on the test.  I asked her if we could have a small study group on Saturdays.  Without even a second thought she said, “Of course.”  Since the first week, a small group of recruits meet in a library every Saturday and go over course material.  With their help I have been able to dominate the tests.  The other Lakewood recruits have also helped me to stay positive.  We all seek each other out after the tests, making sure that we all passed.  The group of Lakewood recruits watch out of each other.  We have even started a “friendship dinner.”  We all try to meet up once a month for dinner with our significant others.  We are truly starting to become a family.  We will not let each other fail, and I am thankful for each and every one of them. 

1 comment:

  1. Becoming a family is what it is all about!! Best of luck to you!!

    ReplyDelete